There once was a young man named Cass
Whose balls were made of spun glass
He'd clang them together
And play "Stormy Weather"
While lightning shot out of his ass

Oh! cabin boy, Oh! cabin boy,
You dirty little nipper
You lined your ass
With broken glass
And circumscised the skipper

There was a young lady named Ransom
Who was ravished three times in a hansom
When she cried out for more
A voice from the floor
Said "Lady I'm Simpson not Sampson!"

An Argentine gaucho named, Bruno
Said "There is one thing that I do Know"
"A woman is fine"
"And a sheep is divine"
"But a Llama is numero uno!"

There was a young lady of Kent
Who said that she knew what it meant
When men asked her to dine,
Gave her cocktails and wine:
She knew what it meant, but she went.


In days of Old
When knights were bold
And, toilets weren't invented
They laid their loads
Beside the road
And, walked away contented

In days of old
When knights were bold
And women weren't particular
They stood them all
Against the wall
And did it perpendicular

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Juan A. Fernandez